[CAUT] English as the "official" Language.

[Horace Greeley]

---------------------- multipart/alternative attachment

Wm -

Ach, ja!  I ze dzat u haff bin tekking lessins frum das Gropinator, 
und vil zoon be muvink nach Kah-li-for-ni-yah...

HG

"The Boobus Americanus is a bird that knows no closed season."  Henry 
Louis Mencken

At 02:11 PM 10/7/2005, you wrote:
>I got this from our son, an English teacher. Enjoy.
>The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby 
>English will be the official language of the European Union rather 
>than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the 
>negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling 
>had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in 
>plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, 
>"s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil 
>servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of 
>"k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
>
>There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the 
>troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words 
>like fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the 
>new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more 
>komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the 
>removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to 
>akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 
>"e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th 
>yer, people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" 
>and "w" with "v". During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd 
>from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil 
>sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and 
>evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united 
>urop vil finali kum tru.
>
>Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted 
>in ze forst plas.
>If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl
>
>
>Return-Path: <erikblees@yahoo.com>
>Received: from  rly-yc04.mail.aol.com (rly-yc04.mail.aol.com [172.18.205.147])
>         by air-yc04.mail.aol.com (v107.13) with ESMTP id 
> MAILINYC43-1d34346c66d8b;
>         Fri, 07 Oct 2005 15:03:34 -0400
>Received: from  web32212.mail.mud.yahoo.com (web32212.mail.mud.yahoo.com
>         [68.142.207.143]) by rly-yc04.mail.aol.com (v107.13) with ESMTP id
>         MAILRELAYINYC47-1d34346c66d8b; Fri, 07 Oct 2005 15:03:09 -0400
>Received: (qmail 46568 invoked by uid 60001); 7 Oct 2005 19:03:09 -0000
>DomainKey-Signature: a=rsa-sha1; q=dns; c=nofws;s=s1024; d=yahoo.com;
> 
>h=Message-ID:Received:Date:From:Subject:To:MIME-Version:Content-Type:Content-Transfer-Encoding;
> 
>b=pzTtoad8XUoQYVujQeuqAnWPuD5ds6mRNkz694TRak6jfUA8tYZcHF2XojL11GrAgJ+t2fQhy7wNJFu4aqtMQfzN3HW/IHuVKCfExjMrm/TSlHTiyeGILP2DL8NuKd8DsIHFzRo28qSwRYzzGL6NBIdgvJSejD9gmXv/EgbqjG4=
>         ;
>Message-ID: <20051007190309.46566.qmail@web32212.mail.mud.yahoo.com>
>Received: from [66.177.160.156] by web32212.mail.mud.yahoo.com via HTTP;
>         Fri, 07 Oct 2005 12:03:09 PDT
>Date: Fri, 7 Oct 2005 12:03:09 -0700 (PDT)
>From: Erik Blees <erikblees@yahoo.com>
>Subject: you'll both like this
>To: dad <wimblees@aol.com>
>MIME-Version: 1.0
>Content-Type: multipart/alternative; boundary="0-416142994-1128711789=:46085"
>Content-Transfer-Encoding: 8bit
>X-AOL-IP: 68.142.207.143
>X-Mailer: Unknown (No Version)
>
>The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby 
>English will be the official language of the European Union rather 
>than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the 
>negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling 
>had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in 
>plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, 
>"s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil 
>servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of 
>"k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards <?xml:namespace 
>prefix = st1 ns = "urn:schemas-microsoft-com:office:smarttags" />kan 
>have one less letter.
>
>There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the 
>troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words 
>like fotograf 20% shorter. In the 3rd year, p! ublik akseptanse of 
>the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more 
>komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the 
>removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to 
>akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent 
>"e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th 
>yer, people wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" 
>and "w" with "v". During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd 
>from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil 
>sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and 
>evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united 
>urop vil finali kum tru.
>
>Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted 
>in ze forst plas.
>If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl
>
>
>Yahoo! for Good
><http://store.yahoo.com/redcross-donate3/>Click here to donate to 
>the Hurricane Katrina relief effort.
>_______________________________________________
>caut list info: https://www.moypiano.com/resources/#archives

---------------------- multipart/alternative attachment
An HTML attachment was scrubbed...
URL: https://www.moypiano.com/ptg/caut.php/attachments/c0/bd/b2/eb/attachment.htm

---------------------- multipart/alternative attachment--