[CAUT] English as the "official" Language.

[Wimblees@aol.com]

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I got this from our son, an English teacher. Enjoy. 

The European Commission  has just announced an agreement whereby English will 
be the official language  of the European Union rather than German, which was 
the other possibility. As  part of the negotiations, the British Government 
conceded that English  spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted 
a 5-year phase-in plan  that would become known as "Euro-English". In the 
first year, "s" will replace  the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil 
servants jump with joy. The  hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This 
should klear up konfusion, and  keyboards kan have one less letter.

There will  be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the 
troublesome "ph" will  be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% 
shorter. In the  3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted 
to  reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments 
will  enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent 
to  akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" 
in  the languag is disgrasful and it should go away. By the 4th yer, people 
wil be  reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". 
During ze  fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and 
after  ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no mor 
trubl or  difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza. Ze drem 
of a  united urop vil finali kum tru.

Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be  speking German like zey vunted in ze 
forst plas.
If zis mad you smil, pleas  pas on to oza pepl



 

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From: Erik Blees <erikblees@yahoo.com>
Subject: you'll both like this
Date: Fri, 7 Oct 2005 12:03:09 -0700 (PDT)
Size: 5454
Url: https://www.moypiano.com/ptg/caut.php/attachments/95/c2/f3/ba/attachment.eml

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