[pianotech] Never get in a contest . . .

[William Monroe]

Well written, Mark.  I'm in complete agreement.

Ignoring the offender does not solve the problem, it enables the offender.
 Enact some rules of conduct, bar folks who repeatedly break those rules.
 As Mark wrote, usually the warning suffices and we go on happily.  If it
doesn't, the ban takes effect and we all win.  We're not going to loose
quality contributers who occasionally loose their temper.  That's a red
herring.  All we'll loose are the ritualistic offenders.

William R. Monroe.



On Wed, Jul 25, 2012 at 10:58 AM, Mark Purney <mark.purney at mesapiano.com>wrote:

> Hi Chuck,
>
> I really do understand what you're saying, but I respectfully disagree -
> only because I've been involved in so many forums and I've seen how this
> has played out in different organizations.
>
> I'm sure you've been in situations where an unruly child is behaving
> badly, and the parents don't do anything about it. They politely ask the
> child to stop, but he does not. They count to three, but nothing ever
> happens when they reach three. They threaten to not buy the kid a toy, or
> make some other kind of empty threat that never gets followed through with.
> But the only thing that kid learns is that he can do whatever he wants, and
> he ends up running the household and becoming a nuisance to everyone. I'm
> sure, in those situations, you've thought to yourself, "I never let my
> children behave like that - what is WRONG with these parents?"  And it
> truly is the parents' fault for not knowing how to discipline.
>
> When there is a line, and crossing the line results in actual
> consequences, behavior improves.
>
> Ask Frank Baxter. His forum has rules, and the rules work. I've been
> involved in many forums, and moderated a few. They all had basic rules
> prohibiting personal attacks and harassment of others. When those rules
> were violated, it resulted in a warning. And 95% of the time, that warning
> is all that was required to remind the offender of where the line is. There
> was usually an apology, followed by people getting along with each other
> again. But occasionally, you'd get that one troublemaker who refused to
> stop, and that person would be banned, and peace would be restored.
>
> As for the Whack-a-Mole game, I've never seen that as a problem, and I
> certainly don't anticipate it being a problem with this group. We simply
> don't have that many troublemakers. This forum is mostly made up of very
> intelligent and polite people, and if there are a handful of bad apples
> among us, I guarantee most of them will be on better behavior if there is
> an understanding that we actually take our Code of Ethics seriously and
> will follow through with protecting it.
>
> #1. I will act honorably and in a professional manner.
> #6. I will promote, in any way that I can, good will toward my profession
> and toward the music industry.
>
> To follow those items of the code doesn't mean we'll all be perfect all of
> the time, or that we won't occasionally get heated or say an impolite word
> to another member when we feel strongly about something. But to repeatedly
> act dishonorably and unprofessional simply should not be tolerated, because
> we've all agreed to not do so.
>
>
>
> On 7/25/2012 5:55 AM, Chuck Behm wrote:
>
>> Hi all - In regards to the forever-reoccuring discussion about banning a
>> particular poster (does this remind anyone else of the "Whack-a Mole" game
>> - you hit it and it pops up somewhere else), I'm reminded of the saying,
>> "Never get in a pissing contest with a skunk." And what if it's the skunk
>> who's instigating the contest? Stand upwind. Chuck Behm
>>
>
>


-- 
William R. Monroe, RPT
A440-William R. Monroe Piano Services, Inc.
314 E. Church St.
Belleville, WI 53508
608-215-3250
www.a440piano.net
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