Funny Tuner Stories

[Delwin D Fandrich]

An addendum to the below list:

8-a)  I once worked with a conductor (also a pianist) who would often stop by while I was
tuning. He'd stop, ponder for a bit, then tell me "I don't think we'll be playing anything
above G# (or whatever)." And then he'd chat for a bit and go on his way.

7-a)  Ah, yes, the customer who was going to save a few bucks by bringing the piano in for
repairs. Instead of having me go there. I had quoted a certain price to replace the bass
strings on his Acrosonic spinet. He had asked if it would be any cheaper if he brought the
piano to my shop. Well, yes, it probably would. After all, it would save me a couple of
trips across town to his place. So that's what he would do. After first taking some piano
moving lessons from Ron's friend on how to move pianos in open pickups. Lessons learned,
he and a couple of his buddies loaded the piano into the back of his old pickup. The
loading task was made somewhat easier than would normally be the case since the tailgate
to this pickup had been missing for several years. Since none of them were in any
condition -- about which, more will be said later -- to even find the rope, let alone tie
any knots, they just pushed it toward the front and took off. Now, Portland is a city of
many hills and they had to go up several of them to get to my shop. On the way up one
particularly steep hill, they thoughtfully stopped to partially disassemble the piano in a
very muddy ditch along side the road. (Well, it had been raining most of the day. In their
condition, I think they hadn't noticed.) It was there that they removed the top, key cover
and bottom board. This work done, they loaded the piano and most of its various parts back
into the pickup and finally deposited it all in the parking lot in front of my shop. It
had to go in the parking lot because the shop was closed at the time. Well, he had arrived
-- unannounced -- fairly late at night. Early morning, actually. The only time he could
convince his buddies to help him move his piano was after the party. Immediately after the
party His friends bachelor party. And a really great party it had been! Dancing girls and
lots of wine, beer and booze. Such were the after effects of this wondrous party that no
one seemed to have noticed that it had once again begun to rain. Either that or they may
have figured they were doing me a favor by letting the rain wash off at least some of the
mud the piano had acquired during their efforts at disassembly back in the ditch. Which
may explain why they left what little was left of the top, key cover and bottom board
leaning against the door of my shop instead of back on the piano. Well, I guess they just
didn't want me to miss them when I arrived at work on Monday morning. Oh, didn't I mention
that this particular piano moving service only worked on Friday nights and Saturday
mornings?.

5-a)  The customer walks into the room with several LP's (remember those?) in his hands
and asks, "What would you like to listen to while you work?"

Ah! The good old days...

Del

------------------------------------

Jerry Hunt wrote:

> The following list is from the Dallas chapter of the PTG website (with
> appropriate recognition of the from whence it came):
> Piano Technicians' Top Ten List
>
> These are the top ten "favorite" things that customers ask of or say to
> piano technicians.
>
> 10. Do I have to take everything off the top of the piano?
>
> 9. I always have the piano tuned every 10 years whether it needs it or
> not.
>
> 8. Would it be cheaper if I didn't have the last octave tuned?
>
> 7. Do I bring the piano to you, or do you come here?
>
> 6. How are my knockers?
>
> 5. Will the vacuum cleaner bother you?
>
> 4. Can you do something about my loose stool?
>
> 3. My dog has perfect pitch.
>
> 2. Do you have to turn every one of those little pegs?
>
> 1. Do you have a regular job?
>
> >From Steve, Dennis, Chris and Dick of the Detroit-Windsor Chapter, as
> printed in the June 1996 Newsletter for the Dallas
> Chapter of the Piano Technicians Guild.
>
> --
> Jerry Hunt
> Dallas, TX USA
> Associate member of PTG
>
> Webmaster for the Dallas Chapter of the PTG:
>    http://members.tripod.com/~dallasptg/index.html