Texas Edition OFF TOPIC

[Thomas D. Seay]

>>>	It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Texas
>>edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Texas.
>If you have one of the Texas editions, you may need some help understanding
>the commands.
>>>
>>>    The Texas edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
> It reads WINDERS 98 with a background picture of Sam Houston superimposed
>on a picture of the Alamo. It is shipped with a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders
>screen saver.
>>>
>>>    Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled "Outhouse", My Computer is
>called  "This Infernal Contraption", Dialup Networking is called "Good Ol'
>Boys", the Control Panel is known as the "Dern Dashboard", Hard Drive is
>referred to as  "4-Wheel Drive", and floppies are "Them Little Ole Plastic
>Disc Thangs".
>>>
>>>    Other features: instead of an error message, you get a Winder covered
>with a garbage bag and duct tape. Also note the following:
>>>
>>>    OK = ats aww-right
>>>    Cancel = hail no
>>>    Reset = awe shoot
>>>    Yes = shore
>>>    No = Naaaa
>>>    Find = hunt fer it
>>>    Go to = over yonder
>>>    Back = back yonder
>>>    Help = hep me o' here
>>>    Stop = ternit off
>>>    Start = crank it up
>>>    Settings = sittins
>>>    Programs = stuff at does stuff
>>>    Documents = stuff I done done
>>>
>>>	We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a
>>>copy of
>the Texas edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.
>>>
>>

Conrad,

We have words here in Texas that they just don't have in other parts of the
country. As a native Texan, I feel it my duty to add a few prases and words
to the Lexicon, just in case you're ever lost and end up in Texas:

1. Mom'n'em - your mother and her friends. "Hey baby! How's ye mom'n'em?"
2. Ovair - elswhere. I put that thang "ovair".
3. Yeont to? - would you like to? Hey, we goin' the mall, yeont to?
4. Jeet yet? - have you had lunch? "Hey, jeet yet? Yeont to?"

By the way Conrad, are your virtual flame suits Y2K compliant yet?

Tom Seay
mailto:t.seay@mail.utexas.edu