[pianotech] crazy customer

[Paul Mulik]

I had an unusual experience yesterday.  A new customer I'll call Mrs. A called a few days ago to say she'd just bought a used piano, and we scheduled a tuning.  I told her, as I tell everyone, that my usual rate is $88, but if the piano is badly out of tune it will cost at least 50% more.  (That's not the unusual part - I'll get to that in a bit).

So I get to her residence, which turns out to be a motel room, but that's not so unusual here in Joplin (you'll remember we had a very bad tornado last year, and many thousands of people, including my family, lost their houses).  She introduced herself and her husband, and both seemed to be nice folks.  I sat down at the piano, a Hobart M. Cable console, and played a few arpeggios, and it was instantly obviously that the piano had not been tuned in decades.  Before I even opened the lid, I told them the cost would be double my usual rate, possibly even more.

Here's where it gets interesting.  Mr. A says, "No, I already wrote out the check for $88. I'm not paying any more than that."  I tried to explain that the piano hadn't been tuned in a very long time, and that it would need at least two pitch raises before I could tune it.


Then he said, "You already tuned this piano this year."  I said no, I had never been to their home before, and I had never once tuned this piano at any time.  Then he said "We found your business card in the bench."  Sure enough, he produced one of my old business cards.  At this point I remembered that I had gone to look at this piano 3 or 4 years ago when it first came up for sale, but I did not tune it at that time, I just evaluated it for the seller (Mrs. B) and suggested a selling price. (Mrs. B insisted it was worth thousands more than the price I suggested -- but I digress.)  Apparently she finally lowered her asking price, and when the As bought it, Mrs. B lied to him and told him that I'd just tuned the piano. 


Then Mr. A said, "It can't be out of tune. We haven't even played it yet."  I tried to explain that playing is not what makes pianos go out of tune, and that a piano which never gets played will go out of tune, but I couldn't convince him. At this, he again said, "Your business card was in the bench the whole time," as if somehow that entitled him to free service or something.  I tried one last time to tell him what it would cost to have it tuned, then he said "But it's been sitting right there ever since we bought it."  This nonsense went on for another minute or two, and it was obvious he wasn't listening to a word I said, so I said goodbye and went on my way.  What a nut.


Paul Mulik
Joplin, MO
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