[pianotech] HFM encounters of the third kind

[tnrwim at aol.com]

Paradise, you say. I thought I was the only one who's out here. 

Wim






-----Original Message-----
From: Ron Nossaman <rnossaman at cox.net>
To: pianotech <pianotech at ptg.org>
Sent: Mon, Aug 15, 2011 2:13 pm
Subject: [pianotech] HFM encounters of the third kind



t all started out on one of those "trapped" notes, when an old friend 
nd long time customer referred one of her students to me for piano 
ervice. While it wasn't her fault, it WAS a Henry F Miller spinet. 
trike one. When I arrived, the piano was sitting about three feet out 
rom the wall, with all the stuff that was on top now piled on the 
ench, which was against the wall next to the piano. Strike two, and a 
oul down the first base line. We muscled it back to the wall, I 
nloaded and retrieved the bench, and got a look inside. Right smack in 
he middle, there was a broken hammer shank. Now here's where it starts 
o get interesting. There are people, and I was one of them once or 
wice many years ago, who can get a hammer assembly out of a spinet 
hrough a superhuman series of contortions and incantations. This, I can 
till do, but it's one way magic. The problem is getting the bloody 
hing back in when you can't see what's happening, can't tell enough by 
eel to make up for that, and have a demonically possessed jack spring 
oaded into the very center of any attempts to get around it. So I, slow 
earner that I am, eventually gave up trying and in more recent years, 
ust pull the action. JUST pull the action, he says, as if there were 
nything "just" about it. Unhook all the hangers, and pull all the keys 
ut, since there isn't clearance with them in. Remove the front board 
tops and brackets from the sides, because the action won't clear them. 
emove three screws on top, and five at the bottom of the action to 
eparate it from the piano. Verbally fend off well meaning but scary 
ffers to help just as I was getting the thing past the last obstacle 
the damper lifter lever under the bass plate strut), and set it down on 
he dark entry path rug rather than the beige carpet. So far so good, or 
've overlooked something deadly. With the action nominally at my 
emporary mercy, I pulled the offending hammer assembly.
There it is - strike three. I was rewarded with a vision of a floppy 
ammer and a wad of Scotch Magic Mending tape as big as my thumb 
andomly and loosely packed around the break. I'm here to tell you 
olks, Magic Mending Tape isn't, and doesn't. Cutting the MMT off, I 
ound one of the most wonderfully insane things I've ever seen in a 
iano, which is no small thing, as the competition is pretty steep. It 
as a Band-Aid (Curad, actually, I think), complete with center pad. No 
lue whatsoever. So when the band-aid didn't heal it, and the MMT didn't 
end it, it was considered beyond further attempts, with all the best 
hots already used up. Oh, I didn't mention, someone at his church gave 
he piano to him. Gee! The break was about a third of the way down the 
hank, and proved to be straight across once I got all the pressure 
ensitive tool kit scraped off, which I thought very weird. But then...
Out to the truck, pull the shank from both parts, grab a new shank, and 
ead back inside. Putting the butt back in, I once again verified that, 
ven with the thing lying on the floor where I can see it and reach 
verything, the jack is still demonically possessed and spring loaded 
gainst successful access and that makes all the difference. Eventually, 
 got the thing in, set the action in the piano, and glued in the shank. 
s that dried, I installed all the screws, stops, brackets, and pedal 
ods, and reconnected the action to the keys. Sigh. Tuning time.
Oddly enough, it was pretty close to pitch, on average, but the tuning 
as all over the place. Made me consider again that the tuner possibly 
AS responsible for the "repair", both displaying similar skill levels. 
atters not, it's less bad now.
I was about cooked by then, at 82°, put the box back together and 
ubmitted a considerably bigger bill than I had originally anticipated. 
 hadn't quoted him anything specific on repairs, but he watched some of 
he gladitorializing from the dining room, so he understood the reason 
or the total.
Back home for lunch. Another morning in paradise.
on N

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